Thought Provokers: 9/20/2023

No fast food chain has beef nuggets.

You can really torture a masochist by not torturing them.

The Winter Olympics are actually 100% water sports.

Pregnant women are landlords.

Humans never moved out of caves; we just started building and living in our own custom caves.

Companies don’t like employees talking about their salaries but expect you to tell them your salary from your previous job.

The higher your phone battery percentage is by the end of the day, the better your day was.

Top secret documents used to be kept on computers to keep them safe; now it might be safer to keep them off computers.

Every single person on Earth has kicked a pregnant woman before.

The human brain is why we are at the top of the food chain but also why we’re the most degenerate species on Earth.

Wearing earplugs while eating something crunchy makes it sound a lot more crunchy.

Holes in women’s underwear are sexier than holes in men’s underwear.

The more money a company wants to make, the less ethical it will have to be in treating its workforce.

Football really helps men talk to one another.

Not enough concern is shown for the potential damage caused by a mic drop.

Rabbits are the mammal version of grasshoppers.

Dropping an ice cream cone as an adult is 10 times sadder than as a kid because you personally paid for it.

The seed of all evil is unrestrained self-interest.

You are more respected if you don’t have Instagram than you would be if you only had 20 followers.

Humans are the only species that assert dominance by copulating with the parents of their rivals.

Air quality is measured by air quality.

Pickles are great until you are in one.

Australians don’t have arachnophobia since their fear of spiders is rational.

When you fall over you technically get hit by a planet.

Tetris trains you for dishwasher loading.