COUSIN CLEAVON'S REDNECK COOKING: Smoked Blobfish

My cousin Jim-Bob lives off the coast of Tasmania and he goes fishing a lot. One night he was checking his crab pots and found a blobfish. The best way to describe the way this fish look is your wife before she puts on makeup or a woman who does not know how to say no to cosmetic surgery. Jim-Bob did not know how to cook it, so he asked his friends and random total strangers the best ways to cook a blobfish.

One person said just to throw it back because something that ugly would only bring bad luck. The second maybe-expert said to just throw it into a fire and hope and pray it tastes good. The...