The Whitehall Ledger - Serving Southern Jefferson County in the Great State of Montana

Articles written by Cousin Cleavon

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COUSIN CLEAVON'S REDNECK COOKING: Dinner or No Dinner

This week we are hunting for the most elusive bird in all the world. The blue footed red tit snipe. I have tried for years and years to catch a snipe, hearing many old wives say their meat is as...

 

COUSIN CLEAVON'S REDNECK COOKING: Mice Meat Pie

It is the time of the year in Montana that if you don't have a well-made home you start to see mice and rats in the house. I know this does not happen to everyone, but my house is built like a sieve,...

 

COUSIN CLEAVON'S REDNECK COOKING: Smoked Blobfish

My cousin Jim-Bob lives off the coast of Tasmania and he goes fishing a lot. One night he was checking his crab pots and found a blobfish. The best way to describe the way this fish look is your wife...

 

COUSING CLEAVON'S REDNECK COOKING: Buzzing Sugar Pops

This is the best way to get rid of cicadas, you know, those bugs that sound like your wife. They never shut up. However, unlike her, they only come out every 13-17 years! Cicadas are very difficult...

 

COUSIN CLEAVON'S REDNECK COOKING: Antbear Spaghetti

You're wondering what an Antbear is? It's an aardvark, an African animal that eats ants. I recently had Biniam an African buddy of mine visit. He was very shocked that we had a car, because he was...

 

COUSIN CLEAVON'S REDNECK COOKING: Cream of Frog Chowder

I was finally able to go on a vacation a while back. My cousin and I headed down to Florida, the state where you look like you have chicken pox all the time, due to the mosquitoes. We went to one of...

 

Cousin Cleavon's Redneck Cooking: Him a Layin' Rabbit

I can hear the questions right now, "what is Himalayan Rabbit?" Well, it`s not a rabbit imported from the high mountains of Tibet, or even one covered in the $80-per-gram salt my wife said would impro...

 

Cousin Cleavon's Redneck Cooking: Awesome Possum Tossum

Last week a relative of mine was visiting from Australia. She is my grandfather's third cousin's adopted sister's friend's next-door mate, in Montana hunting jackalopes and snipe. She had pretty good...

 

COUSIN CLEAVON'S REDNECK COOKING: Mythical Pork Rinds

Here in Montana, you hear a lot about the mythical creature called the Man-Bear-Pig. I was sitting around the fire last weekend with my family and Uncle Jim-Bob told a hero story of how he saved...

 

COUSIN CLEAVON'S REDNECK COOKING: Venomous Nope Rope Bake

Rattlesnake is one of the easiest meats to acquire. You can normally find them on the road during the summer. Rattlesnakes love warm places, because they are cold-blooded, just like my ex-wife. There...

 

COUSIN CLEAVON'S REDNECK COOKING: Skunk Foie Gras

Skunks are a dime a dozen in Montana. No one wanted to catch them or get near them. That is why you will be able to get a lot of skunk livers! The big question is how to catch the skunk without...

 

RECIPE OF THE WEEK: Cousin Cleavon's Bigfoot Toe Jam

I can feel you questioning two phrases "Toe Jam" and "Bigfoot" but hear me out. Bigfoot is number 5236 on the endangered species list and still can be found in parts of Montana. My great-grandma,...

 

RECIPE OF THE WEEK: Cousin Cleavon's Poor Man's Potato Chips

Now you are asking yourself, what is a poor man`s potato chip? Well, it's crow's feet that are fried like a potato chip. It does sounds nuts, but it's my wife`s favorite snack during her time of the...

 

RECIPE OF THE WEEK: Cousin Cleavon's Bobcat Jerky

In my opinion, bobcat is one of the hardest animals to get but satisfies the most indiscriminate tastes. You can either use hounds to track the cat down or use a trap to get him by his foot. When...

 

RECIPE OF THE WEEK: Cousin Cleavon's Dynamite Trout Fillet

Before even getting the trout, you need to get your explosive license. It is hard to do, just like getting the cops off your back for the moonshine you have been making, but you need it to buy...

 

RECIPE OF THE WEEK: Cousin Cleavon's Raccoon Nuggets

Cousin Cleavon, from right here in lovely Whitehall, has put together Cousin Cleavon's Redneck Cooking and is looking to share the wealth of roadkill recipes with everyone! INGREDIENTS: Makes 3 good g...

 

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