Serving Southern Jefferson County in the Great State of Montana

COUSIN CLEAVON'S REDNECK COOKING: Mice Meat Pie

It is the time of the year in Montana that if you don't have a well-made home you start to see mice and rats in the house. I know this does not happen to everyone, but my house is built like a sieve, it has a lot of holes from over the years. I try hard to keep the mice out, but I always get enough to make a mice-meat pie (that is about 30-40 mice) once or twice a year.

I know you are thinking, how do you get enough mice to make a pie? Why not use rats, they have so much more meat on their bones. I never eat rats, it's like eating a skunk that was in the hot sun on the road for days. On second thought, it might be worth trying a recipe for rataptooie!

The way I catch my mice is very cool. I had a local metal artist make me seven small bear traps that are about the size of a half dollar. Seven is a good lucky number when I put them around the house. I set them up and every day I check to see if I got something. When I do get one, I cut off all the leg meat and backstraps, then put the meat into a bag and wait until I have enough. Remember to throw the mouse's body in the garbage, because if his friends see him dead you will have a mouse uprising. It also avoids their attorney suing you for entrapment. No body, no case.

If you can't get someone to make you small traps, think about getting a cat. Then you and the cat can get a little tail, over and over. Catching mice the cat way can result in holey meat or no meat at all.

INGREDIENTS:

30-40 mice meat off legs/back straps

Salt and pepper

½ cup lard or Crisco

¼ teaspoon salt

½ cup cold water

2 cups flour

5 whole potatoes

Half of a red onion

¼ tablespoon chili powder

¼ teaspoon garlic powder

DIRECTIONS:

1. Make the crust in a bowl, mixing the flour, lard, and salt Until all are combined, then add the cold water. Mix until the water is incorporated. Then put the crust into the refrigerator for about an hour.

2. Then cut the meat, potatoes, and onion into bite-size pieces. In a bowl mix those ingredients and the seasonings.

3. Roll out your crust onto a pie pan, then add the mixture into the crust and put a top layer of crust on. Cut vent holes in the top so it looks like Mickey Mouse's face, to be cute.

4. Bake at 350F for 1.5 hours.

NOTE: Don't eat this disgusting concoction yourself, but it's a cheap way to feed the in-laws!

Bon Appetit! P.S. these recipes aren't verified, but let us know if you give them a try!

 

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